1 year later... (July 9)

Today is the 1 year anniversary of Wes' mother's death. It's been a hard weekend, and a hard day. It still doesn't seem real to me a lot of the time.

I've been thinking about the last few days we spent with her, how difficult it was to see her body deteriorate so quickly, and also some of the unexpected special and sacred moments we had with her in her final days.

It still brings tears to my eyes when I think about my strong husband, having to say good-bye to his own mother (not having yet reached his 30th birthday). I think about how he must have felt sitting with her alone in the hospice, feeling her ice-cold limbs, giving her one last kiss on the forehead, re-assuring her that "it's OK to go", turing the light out and closing the door behind him....just a few hours before her body would shut down completely.

I know Wes would tell you that time has not healed his pain. Rather, it has only made it worse.  A lot has happened in this year and it's been difficult not being able to tell her what is going on in our lives and and to not experience any of this with her. That being said, we know she is on the other side with her husband, cheering their kids and grandkids on and watching over us. We know this, but it's still hard.

We put a picture of Olivia and her Grandma Pitcher next to Olivia's bed. She sees it every day and we tell her who she is. We look forward to Olivia and all of our children getting to know who their Grandma and Grandpa Pitcher are through stories we can tell and pictures we can show. They are wonderful people who have left an amazing legacy for their posterity.

It was nice to be with family today. We got to join Brandon, Stephanie, Vanessa, and Zach for dinner at the Olive Garden. And, Tara recently shared a very special message and a great reminder that I want to pass along! Thanks Tara! :)

"Death is nothing at all. I have only slipped away into the next room. I am I, and you are you. Whatever we were to each other,that we are still.....Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was; there is unbroken continuity. I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner. All is well." 

Remembering...{June 6}

Today is Wes' mother's birthday. She would have been 62. This time last year we were celebrating with her in the hospital. Despite the circumstance she was in, she had a smile on her face, was joking around, and as pleasant as always.

Today was a gloomy day: weather-wise. We wanted to do something to make it special and celebrate her life. We took Olivia to the grave site of her grandma and grandpa Pitcher (followed by dinner out). I know they are both in a better place, and that they are together. But, I couldn't help but feel emotional when I look at Olivia and know that she will not know them as she grows up. I know they know her and are involved in her life, looking out for her, loving her from beyond the veil. I just hope we can really teach them who they are and help her to know them.

(Picture taken May 9, 2010)

He only takes the best...

God saw you getting tired,
The cure was not to be
He wrapped you in His loving Arms,
And whispered "Come with Me"
You suffered much in silence,
Your spirit did not bend
You faced your pain with courage,
Until the very end
You tried so hard to stay with us
Your fight was not in vain
God took you to His loving Home
And freed you from your pain
A golden heart stopped beating,
Two working hands at rest
God broke our hearts to prove to us,
HE ONLY TAKES THE BEST

Wes' mother, Barbara, passed away in the early hours of Friday July 9, 2010. Barely over 2 months ago, she found out that the cancer (which had previously been removed and we thought she was clear!) had spread to her Liver. This was devastating news for all of us. Each and every time she greeted me, no matter what pain or discomfort she was feeling, she would smile. I loved watching her light up when she saw Olivia. She thanked us specifically for bringing Olivia to see her each time we did. 

In the last 6 days of her life, we watched her body quickly become more and more frail. As much as we did not want to say goodbye we knew that her time had come. I know she has been reunited with her husband and is doing a lot of good on the other side.

As hard as this has been for me I can't even imagine how much more difficult this has been for her 5 children. That being said, I am AMAZED as I watch Wes and his siblings pull together, take care of everything, support each other, honour their mother, and radiate peace and strength. It is so nice being all together.

I love Barb so much! She has inspired me in SO MANY ways! I am a better person having known her.

Obituary

Barbara Pitcher
PITCHER, Barbara Joan June 6, 1949 - July 9, 2010 It is with great sorrow that we announce the passing of our beloved mother Barbara having lost her courageous battle with cancer on July 9, 2010. She now joins her eternal and loving companion Terry with whom she was married for thirty years. She is survived by her five children: Ryan (Laura) Pitcher, Michael (Mandy) Pitcher, Brandon (Stephanie) Pitcher, Wes (Amanda) Pitcher, and Tara (Darren) Bateman; her mother Katherine Rolfson, her two sisters Anne (Stuart) Norton and Monica (Bob) Berglind, and many life-long friends. Her greatest joy was her eleven wonderful grandchildren. She was born in Raymond, Alberta to Dean and Kay Rolfson where she developed a love for music, learning, athletics, and the outdoors. Music was Barb's passion in life. Whether by her unmatched singing voice or her talent in leading choirs and in playing the piano, she found joy in all areas of music. Barb attended BYU where she obtained a degree in nursing and met Terry. As her children grew, it was her privilege to be able to raise them from home. For the last twenty years Barb worked at the VRRI and Arnika Centre as a Nurse Coordinator where she developed many great friendships with her co-workers. Barb spent many dedicated years of service in the LDS Church. Her favorite assignments included working with the scouting program, directing and leading choirs, and in serving in all organizations of the Church. We will miss Mom's home-cooked meals, home-made chocolate turtles, hugs, wisdom, strength of character, faith in the gospel, her laugh, and in always supporting us in our endeavors. A viewing will be held at PIERSON'S FUNERAL HOME (4121 - 17 Avenue S.E., Calgary) on Friday, July 16, 2010 from 7:00 to 9:00 p.m. The Funeral Service will take place at the Calgary Stake Centre of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (2120 - 17 Avenue S.W., Calgary) on Saturday, July 17, 2010 at 11:00 a.m. Interment will follow at Eden Brook Memorial Gardens. In lieu of flowers donations can be made to the Canadian Cancer Society in her memory. Messages of condolence may be forwarded to the family at www.piersons.ca . Arrangements are in care of PIERSON'S FUNERAL SERVICE. Telephone: 403-235-3602.